Bittersweet Milestones...

A soft whine escapes her lips as she drinks from the silicone nipple. Too rough, too cold.

She shakes her head, no, and sinks into my chest.

She wallows around, trying to get into a comfortable position.

A familiar position.

She looks up at me, sweetly, those big eyes gleaming, "Mama?"

"What, baby?"

"Nilks?"

Gone-gone

She settles down into my chest again, seeming to be wide awake.

It would have been easier if she would've just started kicking and screaming.

Mama?

What, baby?

Nilks?

The time has come.

It is a bittersweet moment.

This morning, she awakes, goes and gets her cup, drinks a bit and looks at me curiously.

She's hungry right away.

We have pancakes, early, before any of the others rise. She and I.

Now she is dancing on the table.

Silly girl.

Silly Big girl.

Thoughts & Such…

I trust each of you had a wonderful weekend spent with your families. Ours was busy, but very enjoyable. On Saturday, we went to a neighboring church’s Fun Day and had a good time. The kids played so hard (they had one of those blow up slides) and were just exhausted by the end of the day. We finished off our day with some family swimming and togetherness.

I was glad to be able to go to church this weekend after missing last one due to my children’s sicknesses. My husband and the friends mentioned here sing together and occasionally sing at Homecomings and such. We had one yesterday and we really had a good singing. The Lord came by and was with us!

Ella spent the afternoon with my mom. I guess this is her first time away from me for an extended period of time. She did good, according to my mom. She is still nursing, but my mom supplemented her some with fresh goat milk. :)

Speaking of Ella, I had a really rough week last week. We have such a hard time getting Ella to sleep, getting her to stay asleep, and getting her to play or to just be unattached to my hip. This is both a good and bad age/stage she is in right now. This week was really difficult for me to stay focused on my priorities/duties (with a good attitude) and take care of a no-napping, fussy baby. There were times I wanted to get into the fetal position and hide under the table. More than once. Yes. I so pray for a better week.

A few things the Lord revealed to me through prayer last night (as I was rocking my fussy baby while church was going on….) that I need to do to, well…just have a better week.

One was, keep my commitment to my early prayer and Bible reading. There were a million several times last week that I just needed to get into a prayer closet and shut the door (and get into that fetal position).

Secondly, I felt the Lord speak a calm to my soul. Or, to put it better, telling me to calm down. After last week, I just need a calmness in my soul and spirit.

Thirdly, and this is the second or third time I’ve felt the Lord impress me to Live only for today. Why is this so hard for us? Every thing we do or say, sometimes, seems like it’s based on tomorrow or the future. I prayed that the Lord would just put up a wall when I think about anything past today. Today, I must enjoy my children. Today, I must take care of my husband and family. Today, I must be joyful. Today, I must work on my struggles. Today, I must smile at my babies. Today, I must do my duties as unto the Lord. Today.

How can I serve my family and my Lord today?

Don’t think about current situations or future events that might affect my ability to bless my family. Just do it, today.

As I have mentioned umpteen several times, I really struggled last week. My hormones and emotions were so crazy. It was awful (for lack of scarier term). I was reading one night before bed in the book I’m currently reading, “Instruments of Change” and the Lord put a simple sentence in that book just for me. I had to run get a highlighter and mark it. It said, You do not have to be in bondage to your emotions. Wow. Thank you very much, God, for that blow. Isn’t it wonderful how He gets down to where we are at?

Yep, last week, I was in bondage to my emotions. I chose to be a slave to how I felt. I allowed my feelings to dictate the way I ran my home.

I appreciate the Savior giving me another chance to live for today, today.

My little Sleepless One is awake again (after 3 episodes of rocking) so I need to cut my time short. My wonderful life saving husband is rocking her out on the porch. Maybe she needs a change of scenery?

It sure helped me.

This week I’m thankful for just that—a new week.

This & That

I guess I have been in a sort of blogging funk for a couple of weeks, but I think it mainly boils down to my not getting up early enough to blog and not taking the time to blog during the day.

My best times to blog are in the early morning when all is quiet. If I blog any other time in the day, it’s stolen time. Time from my housework duties or time from being teacher/mom.

Ella has been in a thing where she is in bed with us every morning during the time I would get up, nursing away. I know this phase will pass soon enough, probably sooner than I will want it to, really.

More and more I find that I am becoming content with the current size of my family. I honestly believe this is the right way for us in determining our family size. I haven’t felt this way with any of my babies (and not that Ella is a terrible baby or anything—she’s absolutely wonderful), but normally I would be already thinking about the next baby. Nowadays, it seems my thoughts are more focused on getting my family raised. Getting them raised right. Helping them grow up in the ways of the Lord. Enjoying them. My current children.

Well, I haven’t put my baby clothes in a yard sale or anything and I haven’t said we won’t have number 5, but I’m more content than ever with my family. And I’m more than happy to let the Lord lead me in that area just as good as any other area of my life. :)

Well, I said this would be This & That, so topics will be very random, I’m sure.

Our Garden is coming along hugely, I mean, nicely, and I have taken some pictures to show you in a Garden Tour post for the future. We have several rows of peas, corn, one really long row of potatoes (we already have our first pickins’), string beans, okra, tomatoes, and even banana peppers. I really love gardening and while tasks like hoeing are very time consuming, I love harvesting and even shelling peas and putting them up. This year I am going to put up more canned items..Fig preserves, Muscadine Jelly, Pear Jelly/Relish, etc…

My Piano Recital is tomorrow night and I’m really looking forward to my first Piano Recital. My students have been practicing hard and I can’t wait for them to shine. Each student is playing two pieces and I have five participating (one can’t come…), so it shouldn’t last but maybe 30 minutes. I am having a small reception for them afterwards. We are taking the summer months off from piano lessons/guitar and I’m really looking forward to having free Thursday evenings/nights. I know I’ll be ready for the extra money to start back up in September. ;)

We are still doing school. We didn’t start until mid-late Sept because of Ella’s arrival, so we are late finishing up. Last week, I had Em double up on Math and this week we are supposed to be doubling up on Language, but so far because of the things mentioned in one of the below paragraphs, we haven’t done any Language this week.

Speaking of school, I know I have mentioned before, but we love reading here at our home. We love to read aloud to the children and enjoy the books as much as the kids do. A few years ago, I discovered this website of book recommendations: http://www.classical-homeschooling.org/celoop/1000.html. I ordered the first 2 or 3 books on the 4-6 reading level and read them to the kids. This was pre-Emory-reading. The other day, I discovered that book list in my Home Management Binder and I got excited about reading some of the books on the list. I ordered, The Big Wave by Pearl S. Buck, Bright April by Marguerite de Angeli, and Caddie Woodlawn by Carol Brink. We have finished The Big Wave and I’ve started on Caddie Woodlawn with Erin (she begs for more chapters—think “Little House” series). Truly one of the great parts of Homeschooling for me is reading great literature together. What are you currently reading aloud in your home?

We’ve had a bit of sickness in our home lately, but God has given us strength to make it through it. I had two bouts of Mastitis, then I have had 2 sinus infections within a month. Monday evening, Evan woke up with a really high fever, complained with a sore throat, and vomited before bed. Ella woke up in the night with a high fever. I very rarely take my kids to the doctor (I have my reasons for avoiding the dr.) but I knew Evan had Strep Throat from his symptoms. I wasn’t sure about Ella, but if she had it, I knew things wouldn’t be good with her being so little. She checked out okay, but is still running fever this morning. I guess she is just fighting off getting strep? Anyway, I know things could be worse, but I am ready to be well.

Overall, life is happening. I am busy trying to keep my home tidy, washing/hanging out clothes, cooking, & caring for little ones. All with trying to give my honey some attention, but not really the amount he deserves. :/

I’ve been enjoying reading your blogs. My current favorite blog from my blog list is Katy’s from Country Blossom. She has such a sweet spirit and I love to read about her days. She has some good archives too. Check her out.

May your day be filled with God’s love and your daily life be led by His Spirit. :) :)

I’ve gone to bed with a heating pad..

Doesn’t that sound romantic? :) Yesterday started out wonderful because my Super Dh was off for some Holiday (Confederate Memorial?) and we loooove to have Daddy home with us.The day was spent doing some outside chores..cutting grass, weed eating, working on scraping boards for our bathroom remodeling project, with the kids playing outside all day long.

In the evening, I begin to notice that my breast began to get extremely sore (sorry, male readers!) and I started getting really chilled. By nightfall, I knew the diagnosis for the all-to-familiar-feeling: mastitis. I began to take the proper steps for optimal comfort: a grand-sitter, an hour long bath, a heating pad, an enthusiastic baby, and lots of rest. Oh, and an ibuprofen.

So, here I lay (lie?) with the heating pad still going and the chills still happenin’. I’m waiting on my mom to bring me a few natural remedies from the health food store, which include high doses of Vitamin C and Echinacea Root Tincture. And let’s not forget whole cloves of garlic for me to ingest. I’m all about swallowing raw garlic on a regular basis, you know.

So now you know the scoop regarding my love affair with my heating pad. It’s a Burnin’ love.